19 Months...My Little Lady.

Dearest Mads,

You are 19 months.  Wow-wee what a big girl.  Mummy has written 19 letters to you since you were born, actually a few more than that as I wrote a few more when you were tiny.  I cannot believe you are over a year and a half.  I wish I could slow the time down a little bit.  We are having so much fun at the moment, if we could freeze time and enjoy all these moments together that would only be a good thing.

In my letters I always write about what you are doing and the milestones you have reached.  This month is no exception, you are a little chatterbox and you learn new words each day.  But this month I wanted to tell you how much you have changed me as a person.

Being your mama brings a joy into my life that I never thought was possible.  I was already pretty happy before you came along- I have a fabulous relationship with your Daddy, a lovely little home and a loving family.  But you made my life complete.  I had a good job, nice friends and I was always busy.  But you gave my life a purpose.

I didn't know what kind of Mummy I was going to be.  I worried I was going to struggle with you, that I wouldn't know what to do if you were sad, or how to stimulate you.  But now I know that it doesn't matter.  Because in your eyes I am the only Mummy you need.  I wipe away your tears, kiss your grazes when you hurt yourself, and make you giggle more than anyone else.  Even at 19 months, we have our own little private jokes that make us laugh.

It is hard to explain, but when you are a Mummy you become part of an elite club.  A special club, where you truly put someone elses needs before your own.  You are the first thing I think about when I wake up in the morning and the last thing I think about at night.  When I am at work, I stare at my photo of you on my desk and smile because you are mine.

People constantly tell me how beautiful you are, and I know I am not being biased.  You really are a cutie, with your little curls and your big blue eyes.  You make my heart swell with pride- I am so immensely proud to be your Mummy.  I can honestly say it is an honour.

You are a pleasure to be around, and I love watching the world through your eyes.  The way the smallest things make you excited and the way your innocence and love shines through to all that meet you.  Sometimes it scares me as the world is a frightening place but I will do my best to protect you and let you spread your wings at the same time.

You are so affectionate, sometimes you stop whatever you are doing to come and give us a kiss, or a cuddle.  I think you are going to be a bit soppy like your Mummy (after all look at this blog!) but yet at the same time you are fiercly independent.  

As I draw your nineteen month letter to a close, I just wanted to try and explain to you what you mean to me and what it means to me to be a Mummy.  Sometimes we have days when it can be tiring and sometimes you drive me mad, but it is the best job in the world and something I will never ever take for granted.

You make Daddy and I the happiest pair in the whole world and every day I am thankful that it was you that came into our lives.

Mummy loves you more than anything in the world.  But as always you already knew that.

Mummy

xx