When we found out we were having another little girl at my twenty week scan I must admit to imagining two little girls with pretty blondy brown curls running around hand in hand- sharing toys, sharing secrets and of course causing their Daddy a lot of strife!

I knew that Mads would take having a new baby in her stride, she isn't a particularly clingy toddler, in fact she is pretty independent, so I thought that while we might have a bit of jealousy, she would be pretty relaxed about a new sibling shaking up her world.

What I didn't bargain for was that from the very second Mads first clapped eyes on LL when she came to meet her for the first time, she stepped into her role as 'big sister' in more ways than I could ever have imagined.  

I have never been so proud of the way in which Mads has completely embraced LL into our family, and the way she is with her makes my heart melt at least ten times a day.  I have friends with siblings who had said to me that the older one, while not jealous or upset by the arrival of the new baby, just wasn't particularly bothered and didn't pay them much attention.  

This couldn't be further from the case with Mads.  Every morning she comes into our room and calls out for 'Baby LL'.  She asks to cuddle her, she asks me to put her next to her in bed so she can snuggle up next to her and she constantly says 'I love Baby LL- she's my sister,' or 'We are best friends.'

She lies next to her on the sofa and strokes her ear, which is her comfort.  There is nothing better when you are tired than stroking your baby sister's ear!  When she gets up from her nap she always asks to go and see Baby LL.  

She talks to her and includes her in the conversations, say for example we go out she will say 'We are going to the park, aren't we Baby LL?'  Or 'Shall we go home and have lunch Baby LL?'  When people coo over her, Mads will say 'That's my sister.'  

At night time she will always give her a kiss goodnight and say 'Love you Baby LL.'  

I can honestly say she has never shown one single ounce of jealousy or animosity towards her new sister.  The way she is with her is just so kind and caring, she really does love her and I am so proud of her for the way she is with her.  

LL is just starting to notice her now, and I can't wait to see how their bond develops as she starts to get more interactive.  She is starting to give her beaming smiles and Mads always says 'Look Mummy Baby LL is smiling at me.'

I know that as they get older they will fight like cat and dog, after all that's what sisters are for, but I do hope that they will always be the very best of friends.  I really hope that I have given each of them a friend and a companion that they can depend on always and I hope that as they grow up they will stay as close.

It truly is a joy watching them together.  

My gorgeous little ladies.

And my very special sisters.

 ********

Some recent iPhone photos of my lovely sister's.

 When I was little, I used to love the bluebell season.  I remember every year going on a walk to see if we could find them, and I even remember once my friend having a fairy party in the middle of a field of them.  As a young girl, I remember seeing the beautiful blanket of blue on the ground and thinking it was magical.  I always remember going out walking with my Mum and Dad, with our dog, searching for conkers or looking at wild mushrooms.

So this past weekend I told Mr E and Mads we were off on a hunt for bluebells in a nearby wood.  Mr E looked a little bit unimpressed as there weren't many blankets of bluebells for him being a boy growing up in Manchester city, but he humoured me and off we all went.

They were every bit as magical as I remembered as a little girl.  We went to the same wood about three weeks ago and there was no sign of them, but almost overnight they have grown, and actually are on their way out as they don't stick around for long.

Ok so our journey wasn't quite so magical, it was muddy, we all got covered from head to toe in dirt, we couldn't sit on the ground to take photos because it was so wet, and Mads needed a poo and two wee's and we didn't take a potty with us. (Cue me holding her legs while she did her business- that is a memory in itself!)

But they were worth the journey to go and see them.

I want my girls to have a childhood full of magic and make believe.  

I want us to go hunting for fairies, looking for treasure, make dens in the garden, write letters to Father Christmas and look for the beauty in the ordinary world we live in.

Children seem in such a hurry to grow up nowadays and I feel really sad when I see young girls strutting around town in makeup and aspring to be people like the cast from TOWIE or Katie Price.

While I know my girl's will grow up and while I know I can't keep them innocent forever, while they are little and while they are still so pure and unaffected by the not so nice things in the world, I want to make sure that I give them a childhood full of imagination, fun and make believe.

There will be a time when searching for bluebells with their Mummy and Daddy couldn't be less fun, so I am going to enjoy every single cold, muddy, wet walk that we take.  Even if we do end up covered in dirt and even if I have to hold Mad's while she does a number two!

Because that's what being a parent is all about.  Getting up and out the house at 9am on a Sunday morning to have a little adventure.  Even if we are a bit tired, or stressed, or can't really be bothered.  

It's about making memories, having adventures and making sure they have a childhood they can look back on and smile about.

Because my little girls aren't going to be little forever.

I remember when I first became pregnant with LL, or even when we thought about having another child, I couldn't possibly imagine my heart expanding enough to love another baby as much as I did Mads.  

I have a little sister and I always joked to my Mum 'Which of us is your favourite?'  Even when I was young, I thought you couldn't possibly love your children exactly the same- surely my Mum sneakily was more fond of me because I was the first born, or had more of a bond with Anna because she was the baby?

I wasn't worried- I knew I would love our new baby more than anything, but there was still a tiny shed of doubt in my mind about the dynamics of having two children.

And of course, the second I held LL for the first time, in fact the second I first heard her cry, just like that my heart expanded and I loved her just as much as her sister.  

Mads is my 'big girl' and LL is my 'baby girl'.

But it is hard to describe the love I feel for my little ladies, and in a way it is different, yet at the same time it is totally the same.  

Mads is my first born and I had two years of her being our everything.  I nervously watched her grow and achieve her milestones, and I consulted 'Dr Google', my Mum and friends to make sure I was doing a good job.  She is growing into a cheeky, wonderful little girl and I couldn't be any more proud of her.  In a way my love for her has grown even more since LL came along as she is so affectionate and caring towards her sister.  She is just incredible.

But LL...well she's my baby.  And I am 99% sure she is our last baby.

I feel more confident as a Mummy.  Of course I worry about her, I take her temperature far more often than I need too, and I wake up in the night to check she is breathing.  I still consult Dr Google.  But I feel like I know that I am doing a good job this time around.  After all, her sister is turning into a lovely little person.

I am more relaxed, as a mother, and about routine.  She still sleeps downstairs with us in the evening, and I am in no hurry to stop our evening snuggles.  She doesn't go in her moses basket for nap times, instead snuggling next to me on the sofa or in my arms.  I have probably made a rod for my own back for the future but at the moment she is a very chilled out baby.

I am relishing every single cuddle, feed and smile.  With Mads I had the luxury of being able to do that all day long, but with LL I obviously have Mads to look after now too.  

For some reason it makes those little moments even more special.

A lot of the time life revolves around Mads, she is more demanding of our attention, and we cater to her needs at the moment.  I will put LL on the sofa and realise that I haven't even looked at her for 10 minutes.  But when I do catch her eye she gives me the biggest smile as if to say 'I am here Mummy and I am ok.'  And that smile just gives me shivers, she really smiles with her eyes.

I can't really explain it but this added confidence, these snatched special moments, and the fact that she is more than likely going to be the final baby in our family, means that I am finding this stage just so intense and incredible.  My heart aches for her and I cannot explain the way she has completed our family. 

With Mads, I was more than happy to express milk so my Mum could have her while we went out occasionally, and I loved that she was so independent and went to anyone.  It made me proud that I had a chilled out, relaxed, independent baby.  But with LL, I just want her close to me.  I want to enjoy every milk coma cuddle, every sleepy stretch and every gummy smile.  

She may be a very tiny little person but she has filled a very BIG role.

She has made our family complete and stolen the remainder of my heart.  She has created love and emotions I didn't even know existed, and I certainly didn't think I would feel.

She is my gorgeous, smiley, chilled out little lady.  The little sister to my beautiful big girl.

She's my baby.  And she's the missing piece.

And that makes her very special indeed.

This long Bank Holiday Weekend we mostly have been...

Basking on blankets in the sunshine (or in the shade if your LL!)

Meeting my in-laws in Stamford for the day and going for lunch and playing in the park.

Going down slides with Daddy really fast!

Having a picnic in the back garden.

Mixing paints in order to create masterpieces.

Creating those masterpieces.

Been put in stupid sun hats that completely ruin our street cred.

We went to the park for a walk and of course had to stop for an ice cream.

And we found a 'jungle' that needed exploring.

We stopped for a nice long picnic in the sunshine.

And lay on a blanket and looked up at the sky.

We went to a family BBQ at Grandma's house.

And we shared a joke with the rest of the family.

All in all it has been a lovely, relaxed long bank holiday with a mixture of DIY and house sorting thrown in for good measure.  

Why can't all weekend's be three days long?