Click on the image for the source credit.
Since becoming a Mummy I have become seriously emotional. That is not to say I wasn’t before. I have always been a crier. Whereas some people bottle it up and keep their feelings to themselves, I have always worn my heart on my sleeve.
I like to think it is because I am caring and selfless but really I think I am just a big cry baby! I cry at literally everything. Anything can set me off- one of my friends telling a happy story about their children- I will get tears in my eyes. Looking at photos will make me tear up- all the memories. Even the emotional staged sob stories on X Factor will have tears streaming down my face. Crying doesn’t just mean I am sad- whether I am happy, angry, disappointed, embarrassed or scared, all these emotions will inevitably result in me having a little moment.
Take some examples.
When Mr E proposed I was so excited I burst into tears. Not just a little demure little tear sliding down my face. No- full on sobs where I was gasping for breath and had bogies forming in my nose.
The only time I have ever had a full on fight with a friend was with one of my friends at university who I had found out had slept with my ex boyfriend. The unwritten rule that you just don’t do. She didn’t have the guts to tell me to my face which is what hurt the most. We ended up getting into a huge argument as she was still denying it and I got so angry I was shouting. She actually looked a little frightened as I am not normally like that- until I started sobbing while still shouting to get my point across.
Just before I went on maternity leave I was really angling for a pay rise at work- they hadn’t given me one for a while and I really did deserve one. I went into the office, all professional in my nicest work outfit, ready to stand my ground and prove to them that I was a top class employee who deserved to be recognized. All was going well until halfway through my speech I burst into tears. Luckily my then manager was lovely and went out to get me a tissue!
So there you have it. Total emotional wreck. In all seriousness, I totally agree with the above quote. I think that when I cry- it is only because I care. I am an incredibly passionate and emotional person and often I can’t quite get those feelings across in the way I want too and I end up crying as I am so emotionally charged. Since having Mads however I am even worse. I can’t even begin to watch anything on poorly or hurt children, and I think becoming a Mum has made me somehow even more in tune with other people’s feelings. I also follow so many lovely blogs and some of their posts make me get tears in my eyes on a regular basis. The worst so far has to be this one. I cried thinking about my wonderful Dad and cried thinking about Mr E and Mads- by the end of the post I was literally sobbing my heart out. Happy tears though.
Crying aside, I do believe having my gorgeous little girl has made me a better person. That might sound cheesy but it is true. It is like I want to be a better person for her. Not that I was a bad person before- far from it, but having Mads has made me less quick to judge other people for their actions and it has made me more forgiving as well. I am less likely to get worked up over the little things and overall I think she has made me more positive. Whatever happens we have always got her, and she is truly priceless. I didn’t think it was possible for my heart to feel so much love- and that feeling is bound to be a little emotional at times.
Is anyone else like this or is it just me?